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Monday, September 22, 2008

clarification

Since this morning's generally light-hearted entry, I've had a bit of "hate mail", for lack of a better term. I feel it's right and necessary to respond, so here are the two brief messages sent to me, one anonymously, which bothers me even more than the message itself (my reply on the topic is in the comments section of the blog just below this one), and one from a long-time customer, who I will not name here, because I like her, and she at least didn't hide behind the anonymous name tag...

From "Anonymous":

"Gosh, Kim, I know you are a big Obama follower, but this latest tirade against Palin is by far the most childish I have seen yet. I honestly never expected this kind of kindergarten behaviour from a woman of your caliper.
Why is it that Obama followers need to be so juvenile in their support?
I remain anonymous so I don't end up in one of you blog slams."


And from "S":

"Kim,
I had thought of many ways to communicate this, my first choice to be just go away quietly. But today was too much. Some one must stick up for the unborn. If you believe as I do, that life begins at conception, you can not take abortion and the killing of innocents lightly. To mock someone who lives this value is not at all respectful.
I like your beads and have enjoyed your site. But will no longer be a customer. Your message today is not agreeing to disagree, it is hateful behavior. Not something I want to support with my hard earned dollars."


What do I think of this? Well, it hurts first. I read these things and my heart pounds and my blood pressure goes up, and I wonder what in the world people are thinking out there. Then I calm down after a while, and realize it won't do any good to slap back the way I initially want to. What will help is to shine our little lights, speak clearly, and wish each other well.

Have we all read The Four Agreements by now? I hope so. And I hope we all go back and read that gold nugget of a book again and again. My favorite of the Agreements is "Don't Make Assumptions". Ever. We can never know what's in another person's head unless they tell us. Period. Once they tell us, we should believe them. So that puts the pressure on each of us to tell our truth. I feel that assumptions are being made about me, so here's my truth...

I stand firmly opposed to Sarah Palin as Vice President of these United States because I think she is dangerous. I think she will do her very best to whittle away at our Constitutional Rights. I think she will set women and wildlife back decades. I believe these things because they are what she tells us.

For the record, I am not for abortion. I am, however for choice. I do not favor abortion as a convenient form of birth control. I favor sex education in schools and homes. I favor informed, responsible birth control for everyone who's out there makin' whoopie. I favor adoption over abortion. And I also believe there are situations such as rape, incest, and extreme health problems for mother or fetus, when abortion should be a legal option.

I also do not take lightly the lives and senseless deaths of Alaskan, or any other, wildlife. And I do not support the banning of books of any kind, anywhere. It's not for the government to tell us what we can say or what we can read.

I know not everyone agrees with me. I don't mind that. But I am saddened by the view that I should be punished financially for my beliefs. I wish only good things for those who would shut me out for taking seriously my right to Freedom Of Speech. I'm here to shine my own little light, and hope that in response, more and more people will shine brighter too.

11 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hi Kim-
There is a poster in my work room that says, "Stand Up For What Is Right, Even If You Are Standing Alone!"
I am here to tell you that you are not standing alone: not in your wish to voice your opinions, nor in your quest for a bit of civility-something we seem to lose during election campaigns. Oh, and that economic "punishment" of no longer buying your beads? Well, I was on the fence about one of them, but I'm just gonna click over to that bead shop and buy that bead!And I will call it my "Take A Stand" bead! This country needs more thoughtful voices like yours. Thank You! Ellen OBrien

Anonymous said...

I am truly sorry you are hurt by some of the comments, because you seem genuinely sweet but Kim, you need to see Obama without the rose-colored glasses. You talk about dangerous! HEAVILY taxing the working and productive people, to give to the non-working and unproductive, which just doesn't ever succeed, supporting the cruel murder of babies born alive after a failed abortion, telling us that Americans need to sacrifice (more taxes) for world poverty...to name a few. Not to mention his close alliances with corrupt politicians in Chicago and terrorists he openly refers to as "friends". He has yet to define "CHANGE" except in the severest of socialist ideas. Please take the time to become educated, for the sake of our country's future!

Anonymous said...

The previous response has me confused. This person should read the details of Obama's tax plan ( instead of repeating taking points from Fox News) which does NOT take from the hardworking, but DOES give massive tax breaks for the wealthiest among us. I guess the previous blogger makes over $250,000.00 a year and wants to selfishly keep it and place the burden of the ever increasing tax burden on the middle class ( which is shrinking by the way). Obama supports a tax relief package for those hard working families making a combined income of under $90,000.00. Maybe social issues should be left to the states, but certain laws are constitutional and to rewrite them to please a moral minority goes against our mandated rights. We should reward with our hard earned dollars, the right to speak our minds and to protest whatever the issue we feel strongly enough about, so I, as well as the other responder, will make a purchase today as a reminder of that right and I will donate funds to Planned Parenthood in Palin's name so that the constitutional right of all women to get information on reproductive rights and treatments will remain available!

Kim Miles said...

Nancy sent this to me in an email, and asked me to post it here. Thanks Nancy! xo!

"Hey Kim:

I need instructions for how to add a comment to your blog because I would happily do so if I could figure it out.

Tell "S" to buy beads elsewhere. Don't let her decide to walk away tell her not to come back. She will have then shot herself in the foot - because you make lovely pieces of art that she will no longer be allowed to buy. Then block her from your site if you can. Lock her out. (It is human nature to want what we can't have and it will therefore cause her to feel less righteous and more cut off. This will, in turn, give her time to contemplate her ever so virtuous position.)

Why do I recommend that you do this to her? Because what she is objecting to is that you are expressing your views on YOUR website. The rights and freedoms that you have as an American give you the right to express any views you like anywhere - but especially on your own website. That is what the right to free speech is all about. And if "S" and her ilk don't like it - too bad. I don't look at anti-choice sites because I disagree with their message - but I do NOT try to stop them from having the right to express their views. Why does "S" believe that she has the right to do this to you?

So, cut her out. Sure it means you take a hit financially - but me (and I am willing to bet, many others like me) will give you even more for being willing to stand up for what you believe in. (And your response was thoughtful, articulate and well-informed.)

Moreover, it is this very style of intimidation that concerns me most about this particular team of Republicans. They do not want the country to "stand together" but want to divide and conquer in order to win. It sickens me.

As for the motives of "S". "Standing up for the unborn?" Please. How is "S" standing up for the unborn by threatening to stop buying your beads? Give me a break. This attitude of hers is pure unadulterated bullying.

Anyway, I am angry and that won't help you. Instead I want you to know that I, and many, many others, stand behind you. You care about other people and you always have. You have given back to the under-privileged and suffering as long as I have been aware of your work. You give back. You don't take and you don't judge. And, you have courage because you stand up for what you believe in. If this was your daughter you would be proud of her. Be proud of you.

Hugs (hang in there),
Nancy"

Anonymous said...

I am amused at how hurt you are by people who simply disagree with you in the mildest terms - Maybe you should think how hurtful it is to the people to whom you direct your sarcasm. You have a right to your beliefs but so do others and I am astounded by how dismissive you are of them. In the end, you need people to buy your beads more than people need to buy them from you. There are many masterful beadists and the smart ones are respectful of their customers.

Texan Zombie Goddess said...

Kim,

I actually skipped reading this blog entry because I knew that it would cause a rise in my blood pressure, and I have three kids to homeschool lol.

It's all stupid banter and stupid opinions. I personally have made my blog a "Political Talk Free Zone" because I am so fed up with all the commercials and "I'm right, your wrong" conversations. You should try being here in Michigan where everyone thinks they can save us...it's *obnoxious* now lol.

Just erase the comments, and ignore them. Support whom you will, end of story.

I *still* love my flaming heart bead :).

Penny \IiiI
Texan Landed In Michigan

Anonymous said...

Kim, your views are your right and your expression of them on your blog are also your right. If anyone doesn't like reading what you have to say, they should just skip the blog. And refusing to buy your beads because of what you say in your blog is just nonsense and I doubt it will hurt you financially in the long run. Anyone not buying art that's beautiful is just shooting themselves in the foot. But that's their right too, I guess. Keep on expressing yourself as you wish. Your comments are well thought out and articulate. If someone reading them agrees that's great but even if they don't agree they should welcome the opportunity to hear another view and use it to solidify, modify, or even change their opposing view rather than just rant. You go girl!!

Polly Anna Randol

Kim Miles said...

Two more friends have asked me to post their emails here. Many thanks to all of you who understand the main issue here: Freedom Of Speech. And my sincere apologies to any I may have offended. I will keep talking though. The bullies can't silence me. Let's all remember to think from the heart as much as possible, and to act out of love rather than fear.

This from Carolyn:

"Kim,
Those two comments showcase some of the reasons it is important for us to fight to elect Obama. How frightening that someone thinks they should be able to force their beliefs on you and me. I don't believe that's what America is all about. Keep fighting the good fight - opinions are just that, whether they're yours or mine. I assume they always ask their grocer, hairdresser or banker their personal beliefs before they do business with them. Take a deep breath, my friend, count to ten and don't let the bastards get you down.
Carolyn"

And this from Carolina:

"I am so sorry you had to go through that.
Republican lines seem to get blurred an awfully lot. Religion governs the government and businesses make the laws. Republicans give rights to big business, yet take them away from the public. They want everyone to have religious "rights", as long as they are "Christian". They believe in marriage/family, but only by their definition.
If abortion kills, so does denying your neighbor healthcare by encouraging an expensive healthcare system to overcharge. Murder is invading countries because we "need" oil. Murder is allowing the innocent to starve, be raped or murdered in Africa and elsewhere. Democrats separate our personal feelings, religious or otherwise, from business, and all the above from government.
It is inspiring that you are able to put yourself out there. Even in the United States, it take courage to do that-specially because it threatens your business.
Good luck to you in every way.
Regards,
Carolina E."

Anonymous said...

Hmm... I believe everyone has a right to their own beliefs, you have a right to the things you do, and people have a right to react to the things you post. Personally I do not support Sarah Palin, but I guess I don't support making fun of people either. Everyone makes mistakes, and parenting children is hard. I guess what I am saying is that if I had a child who became pregnant at 17, and was "pro-life" I wouldn't want people to make fun of me and my beliefs by flaunting my daughters unplanned pregnancy, that's just mean :P :(

Would you like it if someone did that to you? No one is perfect, I bet you have some silly beliefs of your own (I know I do), people might be able to make fun of those beliefs by flaunting something hurtful in your own life.

I guess if you say things like you can see all sides of the cheese etc, then act that way...because it doesn't gel, when you post something like you can see the cheese (all sides) but then do something really unclassy like make fun of someone by pointing at a situation that can't be easy...

Anonymous said...

Hi Kim,
I'm really sorry you have been hurt by this. I don't get involved in politics, too messy !!
~ and as you know, I live in the UK anyway ! Just wanted to say sorry people feel open to hurt you in this way just for expressing your own opinion.

Kim Miles said...

A note to (yet another) Anonymous: Seems to me that Palin is a HUGE JOKE being played on the American public. I'm walking around all sides of this stinky cheese, and find it insulting and absurd that she's even on the ticket. We are smarter than that. As for her personal life, well, to use her own words, she'd better put on her "big girl panties" if she wants to be in this game. She may be a terrific mother and a wonderful person in her private life. I can't dispute that because I don't know her personally. But she does NOT have the stuff to run this country. ~Kim~